Kindness costs nothing

Disconnection is costing us everything

Back in February 2018, Sheffield had been through a period of turmoil around the destruction of healthy street trees, and on reflection, it dawned on me that most of the problems I could see in society were either caused or made worse by 'disconnection'.

Since then, I've been doing my best to help make it easier for friends across Sheffield to become more connected and I've realised just how powerful this ‘lens’ of seeing the simple cause of complex social problems can be.

It's not necessary to see all of the problems to appreciate the power of a kind gesture to lift someone's day, but this goes so much deeper.

A kind attitude, being curious about different perspectives and showing compassion, using our creativity together, we can create a tidal wave of positive change. This is what Love Sheffield is all about, Uniting Hearts, Igniting Change.

However, I've had conversations with ‘veterans’ of social and community work who class my efforts as ‘soil enrichment’ - in other words, the benefits are intangible. In a world of funding streams, budgets and projects intended to ‘fix’ problems, you only get a short time to show a ‘Return On Investment’. I don't accept those limitations.

My thoughts are, there are so many issues impacted by disconnection, that helping people to become connected is like saving lives - one small action can help someone change their future dramatically.

It is helpful though, to consider specific areas where disconnection is destroying lives, and how simple actions we take can change everything.

1. Mental Health Issues

What do we need, to be relaxed, confident, feel safe and accepted? A sense of connection to nature, people who love us and see the best in us, time to process past trauma, and a little encouragement to find the power in this moment, to choose the direction of our lives.

If we can create a space around us, which is peaceful and personal, where people can just feel relaxed and comfortable I think we can all begin to heal ourselves.

If we can reach out to people with a bit of kindness, empathy for what they are going through and compassion. Just accept people and give them some good energy, that can create hope, which is everything.

As highlighted in "Lost Connections" by Johann Hari, a lack of social connections and meaningful relationships can contribute to mental health issues like depression and anxiety. Social isolation is linked to higher rates of these conditions.

2. Substance Abuse

What do we need, to break the chains of addiction? We have so many friends across Sheffield working to save their lives from addiction. How can we help our friends to find their path to recovery?

Realising that we are all doing our best in tough circumstances, that we are no better than others… just a different lived experience. Imagine being surrounded by people wanting the best for you? It seems to me, that's the Sheffield we all want and deserve.

People who feel disconnected from society or lack a support network may turn to drugs or alcohol as a way to cope with loneliness and despair. This can lead to substance abuse and addiction.

3. Economic Inequality

OK, we live in a capitalistic world, where rewards go to those with the competitive advantage…

We know one narrative, successful people deserve it because they're smarter, harder working, go getters who ‘make things happen’ and just worth more than the rest… it's ‘survival of the fittest’ and the fittest are obviously the best of us.

Or the other narrative, that the successful business builders are takers, ignoring the weak and the vulnerable, greedy and selfish, exploiting the workers and just getting richer whatever happens.

I don't accept either narrative, probably why I don't do politics or religion. I think for myself, take responsibility for my actions, work hard, have gratitude for my health and try to pay it all forward by helping who I can and where I can. I don't think that's too unusual… over 70% of Sheffielders don't buy the narratives either, and don't have a vote available which matches that option.

It seems to me, that if we give everyone a break, assume that we're all doing our best in tough circumstances and connect with kindness and curiosity for how other people see things, we're likely to find ways we can help each other.

What can we do, to help our friends find opportunities to be rewarded for their human contribution?

Disconnection in the form of economic segregation – where the wealthy are increasingly isolated from the rest of society – can exacerbate economic inequalities. This segregation often results in unequal access to education, healthcare, and job opportunities for those in lower socioeconomic groups.

4. Political Polarisation

Over 70% of Sheffielders vote “None of the above” in our local elections. What does that say about the level of disconnection between those pushing politics and the rest of us?

It seems to me, that politicians are not using their privileged position of organising, hosting, encouraging, leading and inspiring… instead, they're becoming project managers and business investors - it's all about the money.

I don't think it's all about the money, I think it's all about the time, energy and focus of each and every one of us. I think that politicians need to really, really listen to what people who are obviously dedicated to helping their communities need.

I'd like to see a ‘community basic income’ for individuals who are devoted to public service, with no strings attached… a freedom fund to exit the capitalist narrative and focus on creative giving - I'm looking for inspiring Sheffield characters who would deserve such an income, to give them more freedom to create a greater positive difference. I suspect the best of our politicians would love to give up politics and claim such an income!

The disconnection between different political groups can contribute to political polarisation. When individuals only interact with like-minded people and are not exposed to diverse viewpoints, it can create echo chambers and deepen divisions within society.

5. Generational Divide

We've all been indestructibility young, some of us will enjoy the wisdom of age… why would we rob ourselves of the best of both? Simply being kind, compassionate and creative - we can find ways to connect and enjoy a richer life experience in Sheffield.

Disconnection between generations can lead to a lack of understanding and empathy for the issues and challenges faced by different age groups. This can impact policies and social support systems, as different generations may struggle to find common ground.

6. Racial and Ethnic Tensions

Sheffield has an unbelievable advantage of being the UK’s first City of Sanctuary - we have the huge potential of receiving people from all over the world, desperate to live a peaceful and productive life. We can benefit from this potential, or we can buy a toxic narrative that difference is dangerous. It's not dangerous, if we can explore and celebrate our differences they can become our strengths.

Racial and ethnic groups that are disconnected from mainstream society may face discrimination and marginalization. This can contribute to tensions and conflicts between different racial and ethnic communities

7. Educational Disparities

We have an unbelievable opportunity to reinvent education in the coming months and years, with artificial intelligence making personal tutors available to every human being for practically nothing, delivered to our smartphone or laptop at home? What can we do with this? How can we all benefit? What will we do with all the student accommodation being built in Sheffield?

Disconnection from educational resources, particularly in underprivileged communities, can result in lower educational attainment. This has long-term consequences for employment opportunities and economic stability.

8. Environmental Degradation

I think that Love Sheffield is flooding Facebook with our Love of nature throughout our beautiful city. My only wish is that more Sheffielders could find and join our group.

A disconnection from the natural environment can lead to a lack of understanding or concern for environmental issues. This can contribute to environmental degradation, as individuals and societies may not take the necessary steps to protect natural resources.

9. Digital Divide

This really should be considered a basic human right in our world.

The digital divide refers to the gap between individuals who have access to information and communication technology and those who don’t. This form of disconnection can exacerbate educational, economic, and social inequalities.

10. Erosion of Community

We've been encouraged to become ‘perfect consumers’ confined to our comfy, safe houses and convinced by the media that we will all be murdered by some knife wielding lunatic if we stroll through our local neighbourhood.

It's time to reach out and look for more community activities, and create them ourselves!

Disconnection from local communities can lead to an erosion of community bonds and a decline in civic participation. This can result in communities that are less cohesive and less able to effectively address local issues.

11. Workplace Disengagement

I think the pandemic gave many of us an opportunity to drop out of the rat race for a while. It's not necessarily a bad thing to ask ourselves, what am I doing that creates a positive difference in this job?

The world is about to change faster than ever, and we need our wits about us, to use our time, energy, focus and creativity to find a way to get paid doing something that actually helps people to be more human.

Disconnection in the workplace, such as a lack of engagement or alignment with organizational values, can lead to lower productivity and higher turnover rates.

I hope you found this interesting, and would love to read your own thoughts on how we could be working better together as friends, neighbours and citizens of our beautiful Sheffield.